July 09 FLO e-Family Newsletter

Families Like Ours, your independent national adoption exchange partner since October 2000 – 2009|Greater Seattle Business Association Nonprofit of the Year

Recap from Pride Month

Wow what a month for Pride events! Each year Families Like Ours provides adoption and foster care information to more and more Pride events across the country and this year was no exception. We’d like to thank everyone for all their time, effort and hard work during Pride month. Here in Seattle, Pride was celebrated the last weekend of June and we saw twice the amount of traffic in our adoption and foster care information booth as in previous years. But besides all the new faces we were also able to catch up with many FLO Alumni families, some with as many as five children! The parade was amazing. The Seattle FLO contingent was cheered all along the way, as we gave out balloons, flyer's and beads to parade attendees. Photos are now posted on the FLO website.

New Fiscal Year Budget Changes

July brings mid summer fun, the fourth of July celebrations, picnics, camping and a new state fiscal year. For many states, programs, and agencies this fiscal year has started with the thud of cuts or eliminated staff and programs. Here at Families Like Ours we want to ensure you that we are not effected by that thud in the same way. Families Like Ours is not directly funded by state or federal dollars so our services to you, both families and professionals a like are in tacked. But that doesn't mean the budget crunch hasn't effected us, because it has. As other's are effected by these changes, FLO have seen a 20% increase in incoming requests, educational attendance and barrier issues that need to be resolved.

Families Like Ours is supported by you, those that use the services and programs of our exchange. If you can make a donation, it would be greatly appreciated – 90% of all cash donations work to provide direct services to families and youth.

Ezekiel Needs a Family!

Ezekiel is a healthy and happy 5 year old boy with a generally sweet and charming disposition and in need of a family to call his own. Ezekiel's recruitment team has ask Families Like Ours to help find an adoptive family for this little guy. This information provided here is from this social worker team.

His current foster mother describes him as a bright kid with good comprehension and listening skills, and is able to appropriately talk with others as any other five year old. As an infant he suffered reflux due to a lactose intolerance issue by has out grown this issue. He has two other siblings, both of which live in other homes.

Ezekiel has not had good consistency parenting with this biological family members and has suffered neglect. One of his coping skills has been tantrum behaviors when to get his way, his social worker recruitment team tells us that these tantrums are not out of the scope of a typical 5 year old that has not had a consistence family life. Tantrums and behavioral problems have not been an issue in his preschool and his current foster home reports that they are decreasing. Ezekiel adoptive family would benefit from therapeutic services to help him with his sympathy and empathy responses for others, something he is currently working on with his foster family.

According to his doctor, he is a healthy child and his dentist reports no cavities. Ezekiel attends day care and will be starting kindergarten this fall with an IEP in place for social and behavioral delays. He is physically on target for his developmental age, is very bright young man and enjoys school.

Ezekiel has regular contact with his 11 year old sister, their social worker would prefer to find a family open to taking both kids if possible. Both Ezekiel and his sister are legally free and available for adoption. If you would like more information about Ezekiel, his sister please give us a call at 206-441-7602 or contact us by email.

Families Like Ours Annual Picnic

Each year here in Washington state, Families Like Ours hosts our annual family picnic in mid September. Our family-events volunteers are pulling together the location, food, and more. The picnic is tentatively scheduled for Saturday September 12^th, but the location is still being decided. If you would like to help out please contact us at 206-441-7602 or drop us an email.

Summer Parenting Tip

“I am bored!”

We’ve all heard it, just a few of weeks of summer and the kids are already bored. For most of our kids consistency and structure is key to making it through the day, let alone making it through the summer months. Here are a few tips to help with that bored kid:

• Keep to a regular wake up and bed time. (Maybe allowing an extra hour to sleep in and an extra hour before bed time but limit it to an hour extra).

• Allow reading time 30 minutes before bedtime, but no TV or video games. (This will help quiet their brain so they can sleep through the night).

• Cut down or eliminate soda, try using carbonated flavored water instead.

• Structure some summer “school” activities throughout each day. For example, the local library summer reading program, summer educational bridge books, fun family games that involve math, science, reading and history. (Summer is when kids can lose the most so keeping those key subjects fresh will help with the next year).

• Schedule at least one family outing each week. In our family during the summer we all just take off one day a week for a hike in the woods, seeing a part of the state we haven’t seen before, visiting a local museum, or just being a tourist in your own state. Pick up some of those fun activity books from the lobby of a local hotel and be a tourist for a day.

• Volunteer! Send the kids, and yes even you out into the community to help others. This doesn’t have to be complicated. For example, in many communities you can volunteer to help clean out abandoned lots, remove non-native invasive weeds, or collect needed items for animal shelters. You can even have your kids organize a neighborhood car wash with some other kids to help fund a nonprofit or community organization.

• Also remember, even though our kids tend to need more structure, planning unstructured play time is key to social and emotional development. As parents we do not need to plan everything and respond with an activity every time we hear “I am bored!”

It may not eliminate the “I am bored!” song all summer long, but it sure will help reduce it. There are also extra chores that can help solve that persistently bored child.

Family Skill Building

Let's face it, parenting isn't easy. Actually it can be more than trying at times, but then you add in all the aspects of adoption and foster care and your head can start spinning! Not to worry, we've got you covered. Families Like Ours'  .. Outside the Box Skills and Support, for Outside the Box Children and Families helps you through and prepares you for those trying times. The program goal is to help you find and enhance the individual parenting style that works best for you, and your children. This program has 8 different skill building workshops, monthly support, and support-work groups that meet every other month. Click here for more information or read more in the attached PDF information sheet.

Events Calendar and Upcoming Workshops

One of the new community tools is our community calendar. We have heard from many of you wishing that there was one centralized place to find out what is happening for adoptive and foster families. So we have created our new interactive community calendar which includes programs from FLO as well as programs and events from other agencies and organizations. If you have events of interest you would like to promote please click here and let us know.

FAQ

Q: Can we travel outside the United States with our adoptive child or children?

A: Yes. Once your adoption is finalized you no longer have to check with the social worker(s). You have the same legal rights and responsibilities as a biological parent would have. However, from personal experience we suggest that you always keep a photocopy of your certified adoption decree whenever you travel. This is especially important for single male's and male couples. Think of it this way. Better to have it and not need it, than need it and not have it. For gay and lesbian families it is usually best to always travel with your adoption paperwork even when traveling within the United States.

However, you should NEVER travel with your original copies; keep those in a safety deposit box at your bank.

Q: Can we go on vacation to another state with our foster children?

A: That depends upon your specific placement situation. Prior to finalizing an adoption you always need permission from the child's caseworker to travel outside of your state. Make sure you inform the caseworker at least two weeks (we suggest four weeks) prior to your trip. As a foster or adopt-foster parent you cannot simply go away for the weekend. Foster families run into this situation often. With enough planning it may be possible. This is a case-by-case, worker-by-worker question.

Help Wanted

Families Like Ours is a peer-to-peer volunteer adoption exchange, that means we are here because you are here and we need you! We cannot do this work alone. We are in need of community help ASAP with:

• Annual Event committee members
• SAFE Families -- families for GLBT&Q youth
• SAFE Family volunteer coordinator
• Fundraising Committee members
• Content Contributors -- Stories, BLOGS, etc
• PRIDE Panel members

If you would like to know more please click here and let us know.

FLO Birthday Bash Volunteers needed

Are you looking for something you can do to help Families Like Ours? Our birthday bash committee needs help. We need a few more good bodies that can hit the ground running collecting auction items, filling seats, spreading the word and helping with entertainment. The committee meets once a month and primarily uses email for discussions. This is a fun group of people and no stress! Remember, FLO never receives direct State or Federal dollars for the work we provide families and children. Our funding comes from events like this, volunteers and individual donors. We need your help! Contact us at 206-441-7602 or by clicking here.

Share your story!

If you would like to share your story, a short youtube.com video, an anecdote, original artwork or ideas for future stories you would like to see us produce, please send it to us by clicking here.

As a final note ...

I would like to personally thank all our volunteers for the hard work by put into everything that happens here at Families Like Ours. We would not exist if it were not for each of you.

Thank you!

David